Week 2 Storytelling: The Battle on the Playground of Troy Elementary

The sun was shining brightly on the playground of Troy Elementary and the air was crisp. There was a fresh layer of snow covering the woodchips. The enjoyable weather felt appropriate to the victorious boys of Mrs. Greek’s class, who had just successfully taken the Blue Slide from the boys of Mrs. Trojan’s class. The Greeks felt confident that soon the whole playground would be in their control and they would finally avenge their dear friend Menelaus and retrieve his favorite action figure from dumb, smelly Paris!

            Beyond the satisfaction of taking the Blue Slide for their enjoyment, the Greeks had also found many fun toys inside it and had fairly divided them up. Agamemnon, Menelaus’ grumpy brother, had gotten an especially fine prize, a Wolverine action figure! But the toy had belonged to Abbott, a boy in Mrs. Trojan’s class. He wasn’t really involved in the fight between the Greeks and the Trojans, and everyone thought he was a pretty nice kid.

            Abbott really wanted his toy back. It was his favorite! So he came up to the Greeks timidly with his lunchbox in his hands.

            “Please, Agamemnon,” he said, looking sadly at the Wolverine toy, “can I have my toy back? I’ll give you all the Oreos in my lunch for an entire month!”

            “Do it, Agamemnon!” Menelaus said. “Everyone loves Oreos! And that toy isn’t that great.”

            “Yeah, do it,” said Achilles. Achilles was in Mrs. Greeks class, too. He was the fastest runner in all of kindergarten! Most of the other kids really liked him, but Agamemnon thought he was dumb.

            “No,” said Agamemnon, scowling at Abbott. “Get outta here, loser! And don’t come back, or I’ll beat you up! I don’t care that you’re nice. And forget about your toy. I’m taking it home with me!”

            Abbott ran away, frightened, and found his cousin, Apollo. Apollo was in fifth grade and was very cool. He and all his friends always hung out together on the Hill at recess and watched over the entire playground. Abbott told Apollo what had happened and Apollo became very angry at the treatment of his loyal little cousin. Apollo decided to take matters into his own hands.

            The next day at recess, the Greeks were playing happily around the Blue Slide, plotting their next move against the Trojans. Suddenly, a snowball hit Agamemnon on the back of the head. He turned angrily to see where it had come from, but then a flurry of snowballs came flying at all of them! For nine whole minutes, the Greeks were pelted with snowballs until finally Achilles led them under a picnic table so they could talk.

            “It’s that Apollo the Fifth Grader!” Achilles said. “Calchas, why is he doing this to us?”

            Calchas was the sneakiest of the group and often listened in on other people’s conversations. He always seemed to know everything.

            “I don’t want to say!” Calchas cried, looking nervously at Agamemnon.

            “Don’t worry Agamemnon,” Achilles said. “I won’t let him beat you up.”

            “Well, Apollo the Fifth Grader is really mad because Agamemnon wouldn’t give back his cousin’s toy. Now you have to give back the toy and one hundred animal crackers or Apollo will keep bothering us!”

            “Ugh, I hate you, Calchas,” said Agamemnon. “But fine, I’ll give back the stupid toy. But I need my part of the cool stuff we found! It’s not fair if I have less than everyone else!”

            “Agamemnon, you’re so whiny,” Achilles said in disgust. “Just wait until we take the whole playground and all the cool stuff that’s in it. Then you can have three toys that will probably be way cooler anyway.”

            “No way!” said Agamemnon. “I want something now! And if I don’t get it from one of the other boys from Mrs. Greeks class, then I’m going to take it from one of you even though you’re my best friends! I’ll probably take it from you, Achilles.”

            “You’re such a big fat jerk,” Achilles said, his face turning red. “The only reason we’re even fighting with the kids from Mrs. Trojan’s class if because of you and your brother. We used to be friends with them! You don’t even do any of the hard work, but as soon as there are toys involved, you’re the first one to grab at them! And now you want my toy? No way, man. I’m not playing with you anymore!”

            “Fine then, leave!” said Agamemnon. “Take your dumb friends with you! I have better friends than you and they won’t be mean to me! But I’m still coming for your toy, the Captain America action figure! You need to see that I’m the leader of the class, not you!”

            Achilles balled up his fists and was getting ready to punch Agamemnon in the face when he heard someone call his name. He turned around to see his neighbor Athene, a third grader, waving him over to her a few yards away. He slumped over to her.

            “Don’t go starting fights, Achilles,” she warned. “Hera and I want to play with you after school, so you’d better not get into any trouble! Besides, Agamemnon will get what’s coming to him soon enough.”

            “Ugh, fine,” Achilles sighed. He looked back at where the other boys still huddled under the table. “You’ll be sorry that I’m not playing with you, Agamemnon!” he shouted. He stomped his foot, crossed his arms, and sat angrily on the pavement.

(Children playing ball games, Roman artwork, Second Century AD)

Author's Note. This story is based off of The Quarrel in Homer's Illiad. In this scene, the Greeks have captured a city and divvied up the plunders within it. Agamemnon's part of the share included the daughter of a priest who served Apollo. The priest attempts to buy his daughter back with gold, but Agamemnon refuses. This causes Apollo to shower arrows upon the Greeks for nine days and many die. Finally, Achilles gathers the leaders and asks a prophet why Apollo is against them. The prophet explains that Agamemnon must return the priests daughter, which angers Agamemnon and causes an argument very similar to the one in my story. I chose to write this story as though the characters were children because when I first read it, it seemed that they were acting very childishly. I kept most of the original names and added the name Abbott, which means priest according to this website. I made the gods be from older grades to show superiority.  

Bibliography: The Illiad retold by Alfred J. Church (1907). Source: Mythology-Folklore UN-Textbook