“I am so sorry, my son.” His father’s tearful words echoed
in Nimet’s head. He tried to make sense of what had just occurred. He was still
dressed in his fine wedding garb, but instead of enjoying a wedding feast in
the palace, he was tied to a tree in the shadow of a jagged mountain; he was
the prisoner of Dark Wizard.
His head
slumped down and he closed his eyes, wishing to be back home with his father,
King Buyuk. He longed for his joyful childhood of learning, playing, and
hunting. Before today, he had never known sorrow.
A rustling
of movement caused his heartbeat to falter. He snapped his head up and looked
around in fear of the Dark Wizard’s return. Instead, he saw three harmless
doves fluttering around the river. Right before his eyes, the graceful birds
dove into the water and resurfaced as lovely maidens. He closed his eyes
tightly, assuming he was going mad with thirst and terror. But when he opened
them again, the maidens remained, swimming in the gentle flow of water.
Two of the
maidens dipped below the water’s surface and reemerged as doves. The birds flew
away, leaving one maiden alone. The girl locked eyes with Nimet. She stood from
the river and walked towards him, her flowing dress and dark, wavy hair
impossibly dry.
“Your
father once made a deal with the Dark Wizard,” she explained, answering his
unspoken questions. “The Dark Wizard gave your father the means to have a son
with the understanding that the child would belong to the Wizard after his
twentieth year. You are my father’s captive,” she said sadly.
“Your
father?” Nimet gasped. He could not believe that such a beautiful maiden could
be the offspring of such a hideous man.
She nodded.
“You must
heed my advice,” she pleaded. “My father is a cruel man. Soon, he will come to
you and torture you. He will try to speak with you, but you must never answer.
Do not speak with him, no matter what he says. When it is all over, I vow to
you that I will help you escape and return you to your home.”
The maiden disappeared,
replaced by a dove that was picked up by the wind and swept gently away. Nimet
watched the bird go with a storm of emotions in his heart.
***
Nimet endured three days of torture at the hands of the Dark
Wizard. As the malicious man went about his cruel tasks, he asked Nimet many
questions and demanded a response. Weakened by pain, Nimet many times nearly
gave in to the Dark Wizard’s demands, hoping it would stop the abuse. But each
time he was about to speak, a single dove would fly within his vision. He
remained silent, and on the morning of the fourth day, the chains that
constrained him rusted away and fell.
Nimet
dropped to his knees. He was broken in body and nearly in spirit. But just as
he was about to sink further to the ground, he heard soft footsteps. He looked
up hesitantly and was greeted by the sight of the beautiful maiden.
“You have
succeeded,” she said quietly, crouching to meet his eyes. “Follow me. I will
shield you from my father’s gaze and deliver you safely home.”
She helped
him stand. The touch of her hand was soft and warm. Soon that feeling radiated
throughout Nimet’s pained body. He looked down, finding his bruises and lashes
nearly healed. The intense pain subsided.
“Thank
you,” Nimet said quietly. “What is your name?”
“Sevda,”
she replied. “Look around you, Prince Nimet.”
Nimet
finally looked away from Sevda to their surroundings, astonished to see that
they stood in the garden of his palace.
“You are
home,” she said. “Free to marry your betrothed and one day become king.”
Nimet’s
heart filled with joy. But there was one detail he had to correct.
“Marry me, Sevda,”
he said, taking both her hands. “I have no love for my betrothed. But I cannot
say the same for you, who have been my light in my darkest days. Just say yes,
and it will be done.”
Her face lit up in a smile, and their happily
ever after began.
(Turtledove by Johann Fredrick Naumann 1897) |
For my story, I wanted to focus more on the emotions of the prince and the wizard's daughter. It was a strange story to begin with, so hopefully my version makes some sense. I would have liked to write more, but I don't think I could have expanded much within the word constraints while keeping the same writing style.
For the names, I decided to use Turkish words that could represent aspects of the original story. Buyuk means "great." Nimet means "blessing," as the king definitely viewed the birth of a son as such. Sevda means love.
Bibliography: The Wizard-Dervish from Fourty-Four Turkish Fairy Tales by Ignaz Kunos (1913)
I really enjoyed your story. I think the use of Turkish words for the names was a great touch. They really show that you thought this out and were invested in the storytelling. Another nice touch I thought was not going into great detail about the torture endured. I feel like it would have been easy to get caught up in detailing this greatly which would have taken away from the main points of the story. Great job!
ReplyDeleteYour story was really good. I enjoy the way you write. Everything is explained so well, from surrounding to sounds. I love the twist of the wizard's daughters turning into doves. That was an interesting twist to things. I also like the ending. Mostly what I liked about it was when Nimit was down, the wizard's daughter helped him to stay strong, and in return he fell in love with her.
ReplyDeleteAwesome job, I really enjoyed reading your story. Your writing style flows very well and makes for an easy read. I read The Wizard-Dervish as well and I agree that it was strange. Focusing on the emotions of the prince and wizard's daughter was a nice touch and made the characters much more compelling. I also liked how you cut out the beginning of the original and had Sevda explain the reason for his kidnapping.
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